Things That Go Bump in Your Mind
Earlier this week I wrote, “Unbelief—or at the very least, a preference for the secular, and for the rational instead of the magical—continues its unstoppable march.” I still think that’s true, although an interesting AP story today indicates that we’ve got a long way to go. As we head into Halloween week, a new poll finds that one-third of Americans claim to believe in ghosts and about one-quarter say they have seen one. One-fifth believe in spells and witchcraft; nearly half believe in ESP. One-seventh say they’ve seen a UFO.
(The poll says that liberals, by a factor of 31 percent to 18 percent, are more likely to report having seen a ghost than conservatives. The most likely to see ghosts are single people, Catholics, and those who never attend religious services. I’m pretty sure there’s a joke to be made there, but I can’t get the bat off my shoulder to swing at the pitch.)
There’s a lot in this life that we can’t explain, and devising new explanations is hard. So we fall back on concepts and language we already have to explain those things. So when 30 percent of us claim to have felt a strange presence in a room upon awakening, it’s easier to leap to the conjecture that it must have been a ghost than it is to understand it as some manifestation of hypnagogia, the state between sleep and waking during which people experience vivid visual, auditory, or even tactile sensations. We’d rather believe in ESP than plumb the strange depths of synchronicity. And so on.
There’s romance in a belief in ghosts and the supernatural. We’d very much like it to be true. Half-a-lifetime ago, my best friend, whom I’d known since we were nine and who’d had heart trouble all his life, died at 23. He was the kind of guy I could talk to about absolutely anything. Several years later, I was going through some sort of problem—I forget what now—but it was the kind of thing we would have talked about. Driving to work one morning I said aloud, “I really need to talk to you, man.” For the next 10 minutes I had a strong sense of his presence in the passenger seat next to me—so I talked to him.
Back then, I believed that we have souls which will survive our physical end. Today, I don’t. As a result, I can no longer explain what I felt that morning in the car, except to say that Dave’s presence was something that I wanted so badly to be true that I convinced myself it was.
It’s probably as close as I’ve ever come to thinking like a conservative Republican.
Posted: October 26th, 2007 under Ain't That America.
Comments: 12
Comments
Comment from Nosebetter
Time: October 26, 2007, 9:44 am
Josh: A lot probably has to do with interpretation. Blend that with the rare instances where people actually think they see a ghost and it’s easy to make a federal case out of it.
“Three in 10 have awakened sensing a strange presence in the room.” How many people have awakened wondering if there is a burgular in the house? How many have awkened with an actual burgular (presence) in the house?
A UFO is an unidentified flying object. I have seen many objects flying that I could not identify. That doesn’t mean no one else could.
Meanwhile, Congress moves toward extending the internet tax ban:
http://money.cnn.com/2007/10/26/technology/bc.apfn.internettax.ap/index.htm?postversion=2007102609
Comment from Josh Hammond
Time: October 26, 2007, 10:02 am
Although most of my experiences have been “connecting” to a soul or spirit that is in transition, at the time of death from this planet, I can relate to this. And why not. Seems to me like this is a blessing and you should just go with it.
Comment from John
Time: October 26, 2007, 10:29 am
You may have struck out on the Catholics-who-don’t-go-to-church-see-ghosts joke, but that last line was a strong single.
Comment from Pat
Time: October 26, 2007, 7:39 pm
I was married when I was 17 years old, and by the time I was 20, I had 3 daughters, the oldest of which was 26 months. After the third baby was born, I decided to go on the pill because I was NEVER going to get pregnant again.
About 5 years later, I had a dream in which a little girl with blonde hair and blues eyes was looking at me and saying, “Mommy.” The dream was so vivid and real that I actually woke up and looked around the room to see who was there. My three daughters all had brown hair and brown eyes, so I knew the little girl in the dream was not any one of them.
A couple of years after I had that dream, my husband came to me, and asked me if we could try one more time for a baby boy. I agreed, and a little under a year later, I gave birth to a little baby girl with blonde hair and blue eyes.
I don’t believe in heaven or hell, but I do believe that our souls are made of energy, and energy doesn’t die, and I also believe that your friend was there when you needed him. By the way, I’m a liberal who never attends religious services.
Comment from Wise Merlin
Time: October 27, 2007, 7:58 am
Existence goes on after death. Heaven AND Hell exist simultaneously within one’s life, by THEIR OWN CREATION. Every thought, word and deed one creates, comes back to them in exactly the same measure so that the soul can “EXPERIENCE” ALL the perspectives of that thought, word or deed to eventually deduce whether it was a “righteous” thought , word, or deed.
If one experiences Hell, it is through their own creation alone, if one experiences Heaven, it is through their own creation alone. No thought, word, or deed is ever lost.
Do unto others as you would do unto yourself, BECAUSE IT SURELY SHALL BE DONE TO YOU!
God does not punish, God does not reward, God’s perfect plan is to NOT INTEREFERE AT ALL with your “experiences” as you create them, HOWEVER, God’s law will not loose one iota of the energy you yourself have created, whether it be “good or evil.” So, be good for goodness sake.
Comment from I.B.Lever
Time: October 27, 2007, 9:55 am
“Do unto others as you would do unto yourself, BECAUSE IT SURELY SHALL BE DONE TO YOU!” ……. Wise Merlin
AS THE FOLLOWING EXEMPLIFIES
The World’s Most Exclusive Kennel Club Presents: The 2007 “Bark, Rollover and Play Dead” Competition
“Live, from the WSJ Editorial-lined lobby of the Bob Ney Convention Center here in Washington D.C., conveniently located within easy dog-walking distance of the National Fire Hydrant (formerly known as ‘The United States Capitol Building’), the World’s Most Exclusive Kennel Club presents: The 2007 ‘Bark, Rollover, and Play Dead’ Competition.
“This Canine Sports Spectacular Presentation is brought to you this evening by AIPAC-brand ‘Kibitz and Blitz’, the official dog food of the Lakud Party and the United States Government. Like all AIPAC-brand products, ‘Kibitz and Blitz’ is made from 100% genuine negotiating table scraps ‘too good to waste on Palestinians.’ Every ‘bunker-busting’ bite is chock-full of bellicose goodness, guaranteed to make your saber-rattling, subservient solon sit up on his hind quarters and shamelessly beg for another heaping helping. And ‘Kibitz and Blitz’ now comes in two pooch-pleasing flavors: Rump Republican Red Meat Chunks (in the shiny crimson can featuring Mitch ‘Mad Dog’ McConnell gnawing on a half-eaten Persian kitty), and Lukewarm Liberal Lymph Node Pate (look for the grainy, black-and-white surveillance photo of Harry ‘Hangdog’ Reid furtively squatting in a doggie diaper). But no matter which flavor your Senator prefers, when you feed him ‘Kibitz and Blitz’, you’ll have the satisfaction of knowing he’ll never again be tempted to tip over and rummage through your garbage can (unless, of course, his trainers at the NSA order him to sniff-out and retrieve your carelessly discarded cell phone bill). So do yourself a favor, and pick up a corporate contribution-size bag of ‘Kibitz and Blitz.’ After all, we’re not just providing food for Straussian thought here, we’re feeding ‘AIPAC’ of dogs. And now, here’s your FAUX-news anchor, Frank Mutz.”
“Hello, and welcome. I’m pollster Frank Mutz and I’ll be bringing you all the leg-humping excitement here at the Bob Ney Convention Center. I’m pleased to be joined tonight by the Democratic Party’s chief leash-yanker and butt-sniffer, Rahm Emasculator…”
“Great to be here, Frank. This year’s top contenders will be vying for the coveted Triple Crown of Congressional Canines, the prestigious ‘Bark, Rollover and Play Dead’ triathlon. Many of these constitutionally-challenged curs have been in training for this event since their ‘hind tit sucking’ days back in the Doghouse of Representatives. I think it’s safe to say that quite a few of them are literally chasing their own tails, hoping to make a favorable impression on their owners here tonight. But before the actual competition gets underway, let’s get to know some of these Furry Federalist Fleabags, shall we? For that we send you down to everyone’s favorite newspuppy, Nora O’Doggerel, who’s been panting patiently around on the Soiled Carpet to present us with a special segment she calls ‘Up-close and Doggerel.’ Nora?”
“Thanks, Rahm. I’m here with two former Congressional dog trainers, Neuter Gingrich and Tom DeSpay. Gentlemen, thanks so much for joining us.”
“Thanks for having us, Nora.”
“Mr. DeSpay, let’s get your thoughts first. What’s going to be the key to victory in this competition?”
“Well, Nora, what makes this event so unique is that it requires an extraordinary array of rare talents. Take the barking competition, for example. Any dog can bark, but it takes years of practice for a dog to learn to bark out of both sides of his mouth and still keep from dropping his chew stick. In that regard, Senator Arlen ‘Fetch’ Specter has a distinct advantage. He’s a rare breed - a Wire-haired Water Retriever - and he’s been the Republican Party’s designated barker on the Senate Judiciary Committee for nearly 200 dog years. His bark is among the best in the business - ferocious, indignant, convincing. And that’s precisely what makes it such a great setup for his spontaneous rollover. It’s so spontaneous, you don’t even see it coming! One minute he’s growling away for hours at some Attorney General nominee or other on your TV set, so you get up to grab another bag of chicken bones and when you return, ‘presto’, his confirmation vote has been recorded and he’s down on all fours licking his bowl clean like nothing happened…”
“Tom’s definitely got a point there, Nora. Senator Specter’s bark-to-rollover time may be the quickest in the history of the sport. The problem is, he’s pulled it off so many times, I’m afraid he’s starting to lose the element of surprise. That’s why I’m gonna have to go with Judiciary Committee Chairman Pat “Trick Dog” Leahy on this one. Whereas Specter’s strength is his speed, Senator Leahy relies on a subtle combination of strident sincerity and quiet capitulation. His Herculean pronouncements (like the one threatening to hold up the Mukasey nomination), invariably lead to Lilliputian results. Like most purebred Hibernian Horehounds, his pugnacious growl belies a docile and compliant nature, which makes him the perfect watchdog to guard a booby-trapped room.”
“Gentlemen, you’ve identified two of the alpha males among the contenders. But who do you see as the alpha females in this competition? Neuter?”
“Clearly the most formidable challenger is Hillary ‘Pharm Dog’ Clinton. Being a golden lab retriever (Pfizer Labs, Wyeth Labs, Amgen Labs), Hillary has a leg-up on the competition, so to speak. First of all, her bark is (strictly speaking) not a bark at all, but more akin to the blood-curdling howl of a hyena. Her bite, on the other hand, is quite harmless, especially when deployed against her erstwhile ‘enemies’ in the ranks of the ‘vast right-wing conspiracy.’ In fact, she appears to have mastered the difficult art of snargling (snarling and wagging her tail and the same time). But her rollover is truly a thing of beauty. More a slow-motion pirouette than a rollover per se, it occurs over a span of time tending toward the geologic, and is as subtly incremental as the blooming of a corpse flower.”
“Neuter, pardon the expression, but I’m afraid ‘that dog won’t hunt.’ The ‘bitch’ to watch here (and I mean that with all due respect) is the Italian Lapdog Nancy ‘Nolo Contendere’ Pelosi. From 2001 to 2007 she howled, yelped, and barked incessantly about the crimes of the Bush ( I’m the Big Runt ) Administration, but now that she finds herself in a position to do something about them, she’s become one mute mutt. I mean, her discipline is truly remarkable. Her one and only weakness is that she has a habit of passing directly from ‘barking’ to ‘playing dead’ without even a passing glance at a ‘rollover.’ One suspects she may be frozen in the supine position.”
“Which reminds me, gentlemen, you two have been uncharacteristically mute when it comes to making predictions about the ‘play dead’ phase of the competition.”
“Nora, I believe my colleague Neuter will readily agree with me that Senator John ‘O’ Possum’ Kerry has a pit bull’s mandibular lock on that category. Not to say he is a pit-bull. In fact, I have no idea what he is, and I’m not sure he does either. While many professional breeders who’ve seen Kerry’s papers report him to be a purebred Standard Poodle, others contend he is nothing but a well-coiffed dingo. Rumors abound that Kerry is actually a ‘Heinz 57’, but I find this notion preposterous. Only sustained inbreeding could have produced a dog so utterly useless for any purpose beyond inducing sleep in himself and others. He is the very nonpareil of ‘playing dead’”
“I’ll grant you that, Tom, but since his bark is indecipherable and his rollover appears to be as continuous as an electric spit, I question whether his ability to ‘play dead’ will be sufficient to allow him to catch the competition. Besides, ‘dead dogs’ are a dime a dozen. The real question is: can he come back to life?”
“That’s an excellent question, Mr. Gingrich. What do you think, Tom?”
“I suppose what Neuter is referring to here is what we in the ‘dog eat dog’ political world call ‘canine resurrection’ (and we’re not talking about ‘doggie heaven’ here). Let me give you three examples of this phenomenon. First, there’s the story of Trent ‘Cracker Barrel’ Lott, a rare White-hooded Bloodhound once named ‘Dog of the Year’ by the Kaucasian Kennel Klub. Need I say more? And then of course we have the strange case of Senator David ‘Bird Dog’ Vitter, who is, I believe, a cross between a Ponchartrainian Poontang Pointer and a Bayou Beaver Retriever. (This hybrid, if left to its own devices, prefers to make its home in out-of-the-way cat houses.) ‘Nuff said about that, I suppose…”
“Excuse me Nora, but DeSpay failed to mention the most remarkable story of ‘canine resurrection’ on record, that being the case of Senator Larry ‘Dancing Paws’ Craig, the Snake River Canyon Cockapoo. Now the Snake River Canyon Cockapoo isn’t considered much of a breeding dog, as it is suffers from a congenital olfactory malformation that renders it unable to detect the smell of canine estrogen. It does, however, make a useful pet in many South Asian countries, where it is more aggressive than a mongoose at hunting “wild snakes” in a confined space. But what makes Larry ‘Dancing Paws’ Craig truly remarkable (even for a Snake River Canyon Cockapoo) is his extraordinary homing powers. No matter how far from home he gets dumped by his owners (and he has been dumped several times) Larry always manages to find his way back safely to the Senate Cloakroom…”
“Thank you, Neuter, for that heartwarming story. Well, folks, we’ll be back in a moment to bring you more exciting coverage of the ‘Bark, Rollover, and Play Dead’ competition. But first a word about AIPAC-brand ‘Porkless Pork-Barrel Treats.’ They’re kosher, and they’re guaranteed to keep your Doghouse Member comin’ back for more! Most important of all, ‘Porkless Pork-Barrel Treats’ help keep your House pet in the peak of health by promoting strong teeth and gums (or, in the case of a Democratic House pet, just his gums). That’s AIPAC-brand, for Congressional canines who answer to a higher authority…”
Comment from timr
Time: October 27, 2007, 10:15 am
I saw a UFO over northern Ca. in the early 1970’s. My flight instructor and 2 of my friends were with me in a Cessna 182. We called the FAA(on VHF radio), who said there was nothing on radar, so we called the AFB that we were stationed on and reported it. Beale AFB scrambled 2 fighters to check it out, they also saw what we did, which was a silver colored ball aprox 2,500 feet high and just about a 1/2 mile in circumference. The lower end of the object was at about 3,500 feet. We were “requested” to land at Beale AFB where the film in our passengers camera’s was taken, and we, along with the fighter pilots, were debriefed for about 3 hours. We circled the UFO for over 30 min. while we waited for the AF to arrive. This happened in 1972 over the Napa valley area of California. The reason that I remember it so clearly is that I wrote everything that the 4 of us could remember down in my log book. We were all assigned to the same unit, an electronics warfare squadron, and all had worked on various types of aircraft for at least 4 years(myself) to over 30 years(my flight instructor) The UFO, at least when under our direct observation, stayed pretty much in the same place, the AF fighters also observed it for over 1 hour after we departed the area. Several C-5 pilots also saw this same thing, as they were landing at another AFB. So it was in general sight for over 3 hours total, it then went pretty much straight up(reported by AF pilots, we were listening to their UHF radio calls on a portable multiband radio) until it disappeared from sight at over 70, 000 feet, as reported by a Blackbird. We never heard anything more about this, but we were told by our debriefers to not talk about it-as we all had Top Secret clearences at that time, we complied with the order and did not even discuss it even among ourselves. So, all I know is that it was a big-really big- silver colored ball with no obvious means of propulsion. That is the only time that I have ever seen something in the air that I could not identify, and I have over 3,000 hours of flying time over the last 30 years. At the time of the incident, I had, according to my logbook, over 500 hours of flight time, and was working on my flight instructors licence.
Comment from Missy
Time: October 27, 2007, 11:28 am
Interesting that your article implies that unbelief in the supernatural is a step forward. I would say instead that not to believe in a soul that survives death impoverishes life and makes it a bare physical existence with no real meaning. Morality, love, hate are all simply a neurological process. Isn’t that what the true naturalists believe. What a sad philosophy. Anyway, from the sound of your last paragraph I really don’t think you believe that. You can’t possibly practice it in your life because it simply does not correspond to reality.
Comment from Missy
Time: October 27, 2007, 12:23 pm
Ima. You left out the old Byrd dog; Robert KKK Byrd. Actually he’s more like a walking fossil than a dog. But he shore duz like them pork subsidies. A grand wizard of a guy who never met a noose he didn’t …..well never mind about that. He’s a great example of something eternal, maybe a corpse. I don’t know. But he does make me believe in ghosts. And that should challenge and perhaps comfort the author of our present article.
Comment from Max von Schuler-Kobayashi
Time: October 28, 2007, 10:53 pm
Spiritual things are real and part of everyday life. And forget the Bible thumpers, for the most part, those who know spirit look upon them with amusement. Sometimes they piss us off.
If you want to study or to learn, I suggest you read works on the subject by Colin Wilson. Two of his books, “Mysteries” and “The Occult” are both excellent explanatory works, they explain many things clearly.
Colin Wilson has numerous other books on the subject of the paranormal, and his books on human crime are well worth the read.
Enjoy.
Comment from jabartlett
Time: October 29, 2007, 8:28 am
Missy, I’ve got to respond to your comment.
My life has plenty of meaning despite the fact that I don’t believe in the soul. I give and receive meaning through the work I do (I’m a writer, both here and elsewhere), from the people I love and who love me back, and via the experiences this world can provide, from watching my favorite sports teams to enjoying the October weather. I don’t get how, precisely, any of that requires the existence of a soul. If *you* need to believe you have a soul to find meaning in your life, go ahead. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg. But don’t assume that people who do not share your belief are to be pitied, or that we’re somehow defective in the way we understand the world. We’re doing just fine, thanks.
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